by Ray Mengall
One of the more difficult things to do in life is to write a eulogy. Examples of eulogies may help a little. Basically what you have to do is speak before a crowd about the deceased. Sound terrifying? Especially since your emotions are stopping you from thinking straight. Now you are expected to get yourself together enough to embark on writing the eulogy. You might find yourself thinking examples of eulogies would help.
Now first things first - breath deep, stop panicking, and by following simple step-by-step guidelines, you can absolutely do this. You can do a good job for the person you have just lost. Let’s begin.
Quite a responsibility has been placed upon your shoulders. You don’t want to just say any old thing, or repeat what someone else has said in their eulogy - even though examples of eulogies at this point would be helpful. You want to deliver a personalized message, one that you can be proud of, and that others can take away with them. What you say will remain with your listeners for the rest of their lives.
The time required to prepare a eulogy and deliver it will vary from one person to the next. However as a general rule, it might take you hours and hours to research if necessary, depending on how well you knew the person, and how much more information you want or need from others. You may need to seek information from others about the following:
1. Memories and stories from family members
2. Friend’s memories
3. Memories and stories from employers and co-workers
4. Memories and stories from neighbours
5. Memories and stories from other associates
You may even get some enjoyment from this part of the process, learning more about your loved one that you didn’t know.
Do not give up now - just grabbing whatever you can find in examples of eulogies is not respectful to the deceased, nor is it fair to the others who will rely on you to say what they can’t. By following these easy steps, you can write a beautiful eulogy.
Aquiring such skill is not as hard as you think. It’s amazing what we can do when we put our heart and soul into it. So lets see how easy it can be once you actually get started.
After all your research is complete, either sit down at your computer, or get a pen and paper and lets get started on the next step. You need to note in point form only what you are planning to talk about. Your points should be very simple eg a town or suburb name, persons name, teenaged years, life accomplishment, social things, other memories and so on. Remember only a couple of word point form for now.
Now go back to your list, and change the order of your points to the way you think they should run. For example childhood experiences should be before the charity work dones as a senior citizen etc. Not exact, just whatever you think. Keep in mind now that you have already accomplished a lot just to be at this point. And you know you are doing this the right way - not simply cheating by changing examples of eulogies.
Now go back to each point and expand on it. Remember you are not writing an essay for high school, but rather something which needs to sound informal and personal. As you write each sentence, stop and read it back out loud to your monitor or your fridge or your loungeroon lamp, or whatever is nearby - imagining it is a person you are telling it to. If it didn’t sound quite right when you read the sentence to the lamp, then say it out loud again as you would normally say it to someone, and edit the sentence on paper to what you just said.
After you have done this with a couple of sentences you will get the hang of it, and it will get easier with each sentence. After writing all the sentences, go back, and ignoring the fact that you probably haven’t written an introduction or conclusion yet, read it through out loud again. You may find you want to make some further changes as you go. This will come quite naturally as you read along.
An introduction isn’t always easy. An example of how to begin is maybe with a short comment, statement or very short story using the persons name. You could also state the main reasons you will miss him/her.
The final thing to add is the conclusion. You could include in this a blessing, a prayer, a nice poem, and other final thoughts you’d like share.
One final check now is to read the whole eulogy back, just to ensure it sounds as you want it. You could read it to another person, a neighbour or friend who you trust to give you an honest opinion. You could also find a tape recorder and make a recording of you reading it. Then play it back. You can pick up for yourself anything that doesn’t sound right. All that is left to say at this point is congratulations on the great job you have done. It does not matter have said, because you have not dragged something out of examples of eulogies, it is personal and what is in your heart and thoughts, and that is the only thing that counts.
This is an opportunity for you that you will never get back again, so as a few last comments, remember grammer is not important, but your personalized message is. Express the feelings you have and don’t be afraid of emotion. You are there for these reasons, as a tribute to the person and their life.
About the Author:
At this stage, you may still feel you require some additional assistance or information, or even be pressed for time. You might also be in panic mode over the “public speaking” aspect. In this case I urge you to seek additional expert guidance at
www.funeral-eulogy-info.com
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